Avocado pasta

I made this for dinner tonight. I thought is was great and super easy. Wyatt thought it was too lemony. So if you are  not a lemon fan cut back a little. I got the recipe here. http://www.thelondoner.me/search/label/recipe

I just stuck 5 avocados, juice from 2 lemons, 3 cloves garlic, little salt,  1/3 cup olive oil, and 2 table spoons pesto into a food processor. I boiled some spirals noodles cause I like spirals and then sprinkled on parmesan and tomatoes. Yum!!

Zoo time

Kai went to the Zoo, but it was really hot, so my mom and I speed walked through it. We really only went so Kai could see the seals swim overhead but there was a 2 hour wait to see them. Next time my love. 

Maelani Bear arrived

I ordered the Maelani bear a year ago or more. At the time I was looking for anything that would provide me with comfort. I heard of Molly Bears, which is a great organization that sends a hand made bear the same weight as your baby.  I remember the first time I held Maelani, she was handed to me with all her million important tubes, wires and IV's that were keeping her alive.  I was terrified her ET tube would fall out and she would die in my arms. She was so tiny wrapped in many warm blankets and what struck me as I held her super still and afraid to move, was that she had no weight. When you hold a baby you feel the weight of them in your arms. I could only feel the blankets, warm in my arms.  I could see my beautiful girl, but I could not feel her because she was so light. I think only 1 lb at that point. I still remember holding her like it was yesterday. As I lifted the Maelani bear out of the box it to does not really have any weight in my arms. So light and perfect just like my Maelani. 

I can not say that the pain of losing her has lessoned, but maybe it has changed not so raw and in your face but more filled with questions that will never be answered.  I wonder, what would she look like now? Did her hair stay dark? What makes her smile? Would she like rocks and bugs like her Mom did? There is not a day in this home that her name is not spoken aloud. She is very much a part of this family. She is the little good angel that sits on Wyatt's and my shoulder reminding us to do good things and we are thankful for her reminders. She is so loved and missed. 

Link to Molly Bears http://www.mollybears.com/

Maelani Bear

Poop

Being a Mom is awesome and I am so thankful to have this job. I love it every day, even days like today when Kai left me big surprises throughout the day. Her first surprise was after I got her dressed in her white pants and we were playing on the couch with her toys. When all of a sudden her white pants matched the brown couch. The second big surprise was at supper time. She was super happy and playing in her bouncer and I thought "Yea, I get to eat supper with Wyatt." Then I hear Wyatt freaking out,  I look and the bouncer and her leg is brown. Its like the diaper didn't  catch any of the poop and was completely bypassed. Supper was quickly forgotten and Kai got a bath. Some days are crappy and I don't mind, I am perfecting my Mommy skills. 

Right before the big blow out. 

I had one bite of this yummy fajita before the second blow out

This is the cute outfit that she had on for the first time today it was covered in poop, I mean covered. 

Kai's first play date

Kai had her first play date at a gelato shop. Being the overly protective, if not slightly crazy Mom, I was a little nervous--especially when another little girl touched her foot, gasp! In my head, I was thinking "Ahhhh! That little girl is kinda close to her!" and all I could think about was, what if she falls on Kai, or touches her face or something completely normal like that. Kai survived and so did Mom.  Hopefully many more successful play dates in the future. 

Yes, you have seen this outfit a few times on the blog and that is because I love, love this outfit and hat.  I was silly and bought the outfit in her current size which apparently only lasts a few weeks so its already getting a little snug and I'm trying to get the goodie out of it. 

Things I'm eating

I usually get stuck on foods. I like to eat the same foods a lot for a month or so and then I switch to something else.  Right now I'm stuck on hard boiled eggs, cucumbers and 1 2 3 dressing with a side of garden tomato. It's very summery.

Dressing
one part vinegar
two parts sugar
three parts cream or half and half
with a little salt and pepper

First 4th love

We celebrated  Kai's first 4th of July at the Lake. We have had a great time and have a few more days  here. Wyatt likes fishing and I like feeding the fish, which you think would be synergistic, but it's not, because we have a rule he can't catch the fish I'm feeding.

Kai has really started to develop a little personality this week. She has found her fist and loves sucking on it or anything really. She spends a fair amount of time on her play mat smiling at her toys and making noises that I fall in love with hearing. I think she says "hi" and I'm not surprised because she's  brilliant:)   Here are lots of photos of Kai.  I could not decide which one was the cutest because she is the most adorable baby around.  (Mommy biased)

Slutty Brownies

No I did not name these brownies, but I sure did bake them and eat them up because they are GOOD. I found the recipe here http://www.thelondoner.me/2011/06/slutty-brownies.html. They are super easy to make and helped make the 4th of July a successful vacation. We of course topped the brownies with Randy's frozen custard because why not, might as we go all the way with the daily calorie intake.

Brownie layers

Brownies
Oreos
Chocolate chip cookies

Kai went spelunking

Kai is very advanced and wanted to go spelunking today. We started her out with a  beginner cave called Bridal cave. She had fun and wants to do it again:) 

Wyatt saw a Jesus face. Do you see it?

The big one

Wyatt and my dad love to bottle fish and this morning they got a big one. A blue cat around 40lbs. He was released back into the Lake.