First shopping trip with Mom

It was a beautiful day at the Lake so we decided to hit the out door mall. I wore Kai while shopping using the Beco, which I love by the way, while shopping I let Kai pick out a few of her outfits. I think she had fun. The beginning of a life long friendship and shopping partner. So thankful

3 things as a new Mom I could not live without

As a new Mom I thought I needed one of everything. I bought the swing, bouncy seat, pack and play, monitors, toys and clothes galore. Now most of this stuff I have yet to use, but there are a few items I have found very useful on a daily basis.

1. Medela steamer bags. These bags shave precious minutes off all the time I spend washing pump parts and bottles. I rinse the pump pieces and bottles then throw them in the bag add some water and microwave for 2-3 minuets and like magic they are clean. Thank you steamer bags:)

2. The video angel care monitor, which is an apnea and video monitor. We had this purchased before our little Kai had us scared in the NICU with apnea issues. I could not sleep a wink with out this little device. I can open one eye and see Kai on the portable video unit which also has a ticker at the top that swings back with her breaths. I love to see the little ticker moving during the middle of the night and her sweet little face. As a new Mom who is pumping and breast feeding you don't get much sleep anyway so being able to sleep a few hours during the night is amazing.

3. Halo sleep sack. We were given 2 of these when we left the NICU, a light weight sack and a fleece sack. I had no idea of the goodness of these sacks. They keep Kai warm and swaddled all  during the night with the Velcro. She loves them.

Most of the other stuff I bought I have yet to use. But I have it just incase:)

Newborn Photos

We got a sneak peek of our newborn photos from yesterdays photo shoot. I am excited to share with you the photos because  I love them all. Click on the link below to view beautiful Kaiana.

 http://inthemomentstl.com/blog/2012/04/kaiana-rose-frontenac-mo-newborn-photographer/

Our first Dr appointment yesterday

Kai had her first Dr appt yesterday and checked out perfect.  She passed all her tests and weights 5lb 10oz.  She is 10% for her head size and weight and 75% in height. So she has mommy's head size and weight and daddy's height:) Love her so much....

Today I had a photo shoot at home. Here are some of my favorite ones. 

We made it through our first day at home:)

Here is what my first 24 hours looked like. I pump every 2-3 hours then I feed Kai every 2-3 hours. I change diapers, lots of diapers, my girl is a good popper.  I wash my pump parts and bottles and I love every minute of it. SO Thankful to have this job. 

We are home!!!

Wow!!! We have been home with Kai for 3 hours and it has been perfect. Daddy read her a story and Mom looked on with happy tears. We are home and a family at last. We are so thankful to have Kaiana in our lives.

Look everyone, no tubes

I'm a big girl now and eat all of my bottles. I passed my hearing exam today and now I only have one more test to pass tonight, which is the car seat test. After I pass that test I get to go to this place called home and Mom is super excited about it. Mom says I have a really pretty nursery and lots of clothes and books. This home place sounds kinda neat. I can't wait until tomorrow.

Day 10 in NICU

Kai is doing well. She has had no apnea spells and is gaining weight like a big girl. I can't believe her umbilical cord just fell off last night, how times flies. We are hoping she gets discharged on Wednesday. To be discharged she needs  to eat a certain percent of her bottles. She is getting close but not quite there yet. Then she gets her NG tube out.  We are really hoping she gets this eating thing down soon. We want her home!  She just finished her 2 antibiotics and got her IV out:)  She also has to pass her carseat test, in which Kai has to sit in her car seat for 2 hours with out desaturations. She has to continue to gain weight.  I am pumping every 2 -3 hours so Kai has a good supply of milk. I was hoping to breast feed, but with a NICU baby it is much more difficult to get them home. I plan on trying to transition her back to breast at home.  Wyatt and I had to watch videos before discharge to remind us not to shake a baby. I think we already had that one down. We took infant CPR just for a reminder.  Wyatt and I have been doing shifts at the NICU. He is here from 9am to early evening then goes home to let out the dogs. I am here from 10am to 10pm. I call and check on Kai around 2am to see how she is doing. During the day Wyatt and I take turns feeding her every 3 hours and changing diapers.  We are really excited to take Kai home. I can't wait to have her in her own crib and her own home and get to a new normal for us. We are so thankful to have her and love her soooo much.

Preemie outfit a little snug for this big 5lb 7oz girl

I'm so hungry, i'll just eat my fingers. 

Daddy loves me, this I know.

Dear Kaiana Rose Hadley

Dear Kai,

I loved you from the moment I saw 2 lines on the pregnancy test. It seems odd to fall in love with a plastic stick, but I already knew I loved you. I loved the idea of late night feedings, kissing your skinned knees, and holding you tight. I fell more in love with you when you kicked in my belly and you pushed me with your feet. I thought every hiccup was an amazing act by you and I felt privileged that I got to experience you in my belly. I am forever grateful to have you in my arms and in my life. Kai, I love you! I am excited to teach you new things, such as how to fish for bluegills with a net,  turn over rocks to look for crawdads and go skiing at the Lake. I can't wait to take you shopping and watch you swim in the ocean. I want to teach you to always be kind and love all creatures.  We are going to have so many new experiences together and I am excited to see the joy on your face.  I will be present in your life. I will be support. I will watch you grow and make a few mistakes along the way and I will always be available to hold you when you need a hug. I am thankful to have you in my life. I am so excited to watch you grow up to be a beautiful, brilliant, happy, healthy girl. I am your Mom and I love you always.

I am a little Hawkeye

Is it Hawkeye football season yet?

I don't know about you Mr. Monkey, but my Daddy is Awesome!

Kai's update

Sunday, Kai had seven episodes of forgetting to breath and turning bluish-grey in a matter of seconds.  Her Oxygen saturation would drop to as low as 45% during these episodes (your oxygen saturation is most likely >99% while reading this.) This was a very frightening time for Mom and Dad.  Sunday night, they did an EEG to test for seizures.  Thankfully, this test was normal.

On Monday, they decided to do an MRI. As they were concerned for things like structural anomalies of the brain, strokes, and brain bleeds.  Waiting for these test results was a gut-wrenching time for us. We went for a walk to the local Panera (or 'St. Louis Bread Company' if you are a local who has never left St. Louis, even though we all know it is really Panera) to get some lunch.  Litterally as we are sitting down to eat, we get a call that the neurologist would like to "set up a meeting with [us] to discuss the results of the MRI."  What did this mean?  Why would he want to set up meeting, unless there was something bad that needed a long explanation and discussion!?  We return to the NICU as fast as Kim's post-op legs will carry her.  The neurologist (who happens to be a former medical school classmate of Wyatt's) brings in the computer and starts going through the images.  He slowly and painstakingly scrolls through each of the images, one by one, explaining what each structure is and what it does.  (Remember Daddy is a Radiologist and all reads MRI's all day.)  This whole time Daddy resisted taking the mouse from the doctor, and scrolling at his own pace. Daddy knew that the brain structures we were interested in were at the bottom of the stack.  Why was this neurologist starting with the cerebral convexity?  "Get to the thalamus and brainstem, already!  Why are you stalling!?", were the words that Daddy was saying to himself, and fortunately didn't let out of his mouth...  After a 10 min (felt like a lifetime) monologue, not dissimilar from the one Daddy gave in one of his lectures to first year medical students back in Cleveland, the neurologist concludes with "This all looks normal." Daddy then lets out a big sigh and says, "You could have lead with that."  The Neurology fellow couldn't help but to laugh at the remark. "Looks normal" is the sweetest sound parents can hear. We are so thankful for those 2 words.  

Wednesday 4-11-12

Kai had a big day and so did her mom. Kai got a bath:) I have never given a baby a bath and was not quite sure how to start this task. Lucky enough for me I had a wonderful NICU nurse at the bed side to help me along. When bathing a preemie it must be a quick task because they have a hard time holding their temperature.  I feel for my fist attempt it went pretty well despite  the fact she peed and pooped on herself during the bath. I quickly cleaned her up with the wash clothe and realized that I can no longer clean any more of her body because now I have poop and pee on my wash cloth. Oh well, she was almost done anyway.  I guess officially I have given my first 'half-bath'. Kai also got the wear some NICU cloths today and has graduated to a big-gril crib. All this is good news. 

Story time

Bath time

New Crib!!

I like my other hat better

Mommy can't wait to get this "hat" off so I can hold her again. 

Unexpected NICU stay

We knew we were have baby Kai a little early at 36 weeks,  but we were hoping to avoid a NICU stay. Well that did not happen. Not only did she get a NICU stay, but she was transferred to a higher level NICU last night and has pretty much has her Mommy and Daddy scared to death at this point. She was looking good yesterday morning, off oxygen, had her first latch and Mommy and Daddy were very excited. Then yesterday afternoon she started having apnea episodes, she turns gray and forgets to breath.  She has had quite a few and will not be able to come home until 5-7 days after the episodes stop. They did an echo of her heart and which was normal and an EEG which showed no signs of seizures. All this is good news. Unfortunately, these spells are more frequent today and are really scary for her Mom and Dad. We are hoping all these spells will be chalked up as a preemie thing and we will get to go home soon. As of now we are most likely here for at least a week.  I look forward to the day we get to take her home. I thought after Maelani our NICU time was done. I am having a hard time in these familiar but terrifying surroundings of the NICU.

Now for the good part, pictures of my crazy beautiful daughter.

Meet At Last!

One very proud and happy Daddy!

What a big girl!

Girl, You wouldn't believe the day I just had!

Can't I extend the lease on my old home?

Proud Grandparents.

More proud grandparents.

Who are all these people!? And How did I get this hat with my name on it?

oooooohhhhh....  I make this look GOOD!

Ok, Fine mom, but this is the last hat photo today.

Ok, last HEADPIECE photo today.

Seriously, enough showing off your etsy purchases. Babies are not accessories.

I am going to miss you in my belly

Im going to miss you in my belly, baby girl. I am going to miss playing "I got your foot" that's our favorite game. I am going to miss the butt wiggle and the hiccups. I am going to miss dreaming about what you will look like and what will make you smile. But it's OK because I get to meet you and hold you whisper how much you are loved in your ear.  

Thankful

I wish there were more words in the universe or I wish I knew more words to describe how thankful I am to have a baby still in my belly. It has been a long road to get this far along in a pregnancy and  I understand that this is a privilege that for some women will never be a reality and I am so thankful for the experience.  I have got to experience kicks and hiccups and for that I am thankful. I am thankful for the sleepless nights and nausea. I am thankful for the biweekly Doctor appointments  that keep her safe.   I am beyond thankful that I will get to meet my beautiful, happy, healthy and brilliant  daughter on Thursday and become a Mommy again. I am so thankful!

March of Dimes, Go Team Maelani!!

We are excited to have the Team Maelani walking in the March of Dimes walk again this year and it will be extra special because Maelani's sister will be joining us on the walk. The walk is on April 28th at Upper Muny parking lot at 9am. If interested in walking or donations please visit  http://www.marchforbabies.org/maelani10