9 month check up

Juniper had her check up at 9 months almost 10 and her Doctor was not super excited about her weight gain and wants me to add butter to her meals, but since she has a milk intolerance this may not work and all cheese, yogurt and milk are out. Her doctor was also worried about her right foot, it turns out when she stands so she has a ortho appointment to get that checked out. When I called them to make the appointment they scheduled me 4 months out with a nurse practitioner, what!! A 4 month wait. Crazy stuff, I am not worried about her foot or I would have thrown a fit, but I think her foot will be just fine. She was breech at birth and this usually gets better when she starts to walking, which will be soon.

June weighted 15lb 15 oz at 4%, height 26.5 inches at 10 %, head circumference 16.5 inches at 3%. She is a tiny lady like her Momma.

 

Chicken and dumplings.... Sort of

I was hungry for chicken and dumplings, but since I don't eat chicken it makes it a little difficult to make. So I search the internet for ideas. I came up with this, I used the below recipe and added carrots, quorn "chicken", cream of celery instead of cream of chicken and I used veggie broth instead of chicken broth. I also added a little thyme. It was a perfectly delicious comfort food for this cold day.

http://mycrownedcreations.com/2013/09/12/chicken-and-dumplings/

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the day. Four years ago tomorrow was the worst day of my life. I knew Maelani was leaving us.  The tubes, drips and machines were no longer sustaining her. She was just too little in this big world. I knew they could do no more for her. I knew I had to sit with her while she past. It's not fair. I am still sad and angry.  I don't like tomorrow. I don't want to remember those hours, that pain, but I do and I will relive it tomorrow. I will remember my friend texting me that morning asking how Maelani was doing and knowing the truth. I remember my Mom asking if she could come up and not wanting to tell her that today was the day Maelani would leave us.   I remember being afraid to hold Maelani because I thought it would hurt her, the moving her around from Wyatts lap to mine.  I remember her sweet eyes and the way she smelled, which was hospital clean.  I remember her size how small she was. The nurses coming in to check on us and bring us food as if we could eat. I remember the hospice nurses coming in telling Wyatt and I how we would grieve differently.  I remember taking my daughter to the funeral home and leaving her there. Then I remember nothing after that. I am not sure what happened in the days after. I don't remember what I did after Maelani left. It was not the life I imagined or wanted. The next time I remember is her funeral. I remember all the people that came family, friends, doctors and nurses and all the people that did not. I remember her books and the music. I remember thinking this can't be real why are these people here this is not real, but it was and it is. Miss Maelani, I remember you. Your family remembers you. You will not be forgotten. I love you today and always. Thank you for those 16 days, I remember.

You can see just how little she is here. 

Her skin was very fragile and it was my job to keep
her lotioned up. I felt like Miss Maelani
was giving me the "Really Mom" look here.

Just chillen here

I liked this hat, she was cute in it.

Hats

Grandma Ruby and Grandpa Larry went to Russia and brought us back some goodies. I got some beautiful nesting dolls. Wyatt got a wooden bottle holder and the girls got these cool princess hats.

This is how I thought the hat should be worn, but then
Grandma Ruby told me the real way it should be worn. 

 

I can't wait to get some good pictures in these hats

9 months

June is pulling herself up to play, continues to be a happy baby. She is talking more and says Mama. No teeth yet. She loves to feed herself big people food and is not a fan of baby food. She continues to amaze me and makes me smile everyday. She has such a gentle heart and loves to play with her big sister.