October, I have this love hate with October now. I love the leaves, the haunted houses and the candy. I don't like the heavy heart I feel the month of October. It is much better this year than it has been in previous years, but I still feel it. That loss, it's there and heavy on my heart and makes it difficult to breath in those quite moments.
The loss of Maelani still catches me off guard. I find myself crying or missing her in odd locations or at inopportune times, but that's ok. I know it's getting better and I don't know if I want ALL those times to go away. It's ok to miss her, it's ok to cry for her and to cry for the loss I feel. It's Ok to remember her and say her name out loud. I love her always and I miss her and it's ok.
This year we celebrated with cupcakes, books and sunshine. The weather here today is in the 80's and amazing. I am thankful for this beautiful day. Kai sang "Happy Birthday Maelani" and it melted my heart. Kai has started asking questions about Maelani and I have found it more difficult to explain to Kai where Maelani is, as I have no good answer. I say she is an Angel up in the sky, but
 | ||||
We painted outside in the morning
|
 |
| Kai loves cake |
 |
 |
| We opened presents, books called Toy boat and The littlest Angel and read them. We are also donating toys to UIHC Children's hospital again, pictures coming soon. |
I know I shared Kiss for Maelani, last year, but I love that it reminds me that Maelani is present in every act of kindness that is passed on. So if you see 3:33 on the clock please smile, remember Maelani and pass on a kind touch or, holding a door a little longer for someone, help a mom put groceries in the cart when she is holding a child on her hip, or any other million opportunities we encounter everyday. There are so many times we can pass on acts of kindness, we just have to stop and take the time to remember 3:33. Happy 4th Birthday my little Maelani, I love you with all my heart and miss you with every breath.
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Maelani
Kiss for Maelani"
Posted Nov 3, 2010 1:47pm
Mommy and Daddy have always had a tradition of kissing whenever we notice that the clock reads 11:11. Even when we are at work, or apart for another reason, it has become our habit to blow each other a little kiss if the clock should ever read 11:11 when we see it.
We simply do not know that Maelani will ever leave the NICU. But we know that regardless of her outcome, she will not be forgotten, and we will see to it that she lives on, be it in the flesh, or in spirit through us and through our daily actions. We insist that this world become a better place because of Maelani Rose. For this reason, we would like to share with you all a story from a couple of days ago.
A couple of nights ago, Daddy and Mommy were catching a few Z's when Daddy was having a beautiful dream about his daughter growing up, full of life and full of spirit. She was a very happy child, with a big bright smile and a beautiful blonde curls. Mommy, Daddy, and Little Maelani were all together and very happy in this dream.
Daddy's alarm on his phone was inadvertently set from the night before, and had been going off for a couple minutes playing the "celestial harp" alarm. When Daddy awoke from this lovely dream about his family of three, the clock read 3:33.
We decided at this point that henceforth, when we see a clock that reads 3:33, we will "Kiss for Maelani." As such, she will not ever be forgotten, and will continue to bring us smiles in our lives. With every "Kiss for Maelani," we will spend just a few seconds to reflect upon that which is positive in our lives, think of Maelani Rose, and be grateful for all the gifts we have been given.
If you have been touched by Maelani Rose, we invite you to give your love ones a "Kiss for Maelani" along with us. You do not have to wait by the clock until it turns 3:33, but when you should happen to see it by chance, briefly reflect upon the positives in your life, kiss a loved one who is nearby, or if no loved one is nearby, blow a loved one a kiss from afar.
Please note, that the bylaws of the "Kiss for Maelani" program prohibit any fighting, arguing, or disputes to continue with a loved one once a "Kiss for Maelani" has been declared at 3:33. Maelani will have nothing to do with this negativity, and after a "Kiss for Maelani" such negativity must be ceased immediately.
Maelani welcomes all of her friends and followers to participate. We hope that Maelani will not only have a positive impact on our lives, but some of yours as well. Please feel free to pass this message along to whomever you like!
